Ode To The Nice Guys

The following piece was not written by me. In fact, I'm not sure who wrote it. But my friend Matt showed it to me my junior year of High School, and I have loved it ever since. I was reminded of this recently when Megan and I went for a late-night walk a few days ago. I was feeling really down and was questioning myself. After our talk, I came home and read this. And I'm glad I did. It's been a tough summer so far, and I suspect that it will only get tougher. But at least I can say to myself that I am great the way I am:

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of "date"able men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgment, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

[The original piece can be found Here]

Wild & Crazy Kids

Just returned from a wild night with Garytt, Sam, Sutton, and I along with a few of Sam's friends. We went to a few bars in Cambridge. I had a great time. I also had a good amount to drink that night:

1 Bottle of Magic Hat #9
3 Capitain & Cokes
1 Bottle of Magners
1 Lemon Drop shot

This is the most I've ever had. Thankfully, I had it all throughout the night, and not all at once (which would probably kill me). I will admit, I did get a little on the drunk side, but not enough to:

A. Throw up
B. Pass out
C. Get Arrested

Plus, I trusted the people I was with. I probably won't be doing that much drinking for a while; I enjoy being sober and making sure that my friends are safe.

Probably one of the funniest parts about last night was that since I couldn't afford a cab home, I ended up sleeping in Garytt's car, which was parked outside our workplace for about 4 hours before taking the train home and writing in my blog, which I am doing now. It was surprisingly comfortable. Ha Ha. (BTW: as of this post, Garytt is still there, sleeping, as he's waiting for a co-worker who's coming in at 9:30AM.)

I'm gonna take care of some errands, and then take a nap, and then make some calls. Don't be a stranger.

Hits & Misses

Sim had a get-together tonight, and I went. It was a good time, but I was noticeably down during part of the night: I took a 30 minute walk around his neighborhood listening to music alone at Midnight. I can't say that I wasn't inconspicuous or anything (cause I clearly wasn't). I also wasn't expecting to be in that mood; it just kind of came over me.

I miss my close friends. And I’m not talking about Rohan and Jon and that crew. I’m talking about the Harlem Crew, of Nik, JT, Wilson, and Phil. Those guys are my boys. And it’s a shame that I do not keep in touch as often as I should. They have been always been there for me and I haven’t been around that much lately. I just miss them.

I’m trying to not let girls get into my head too often, as there are other things that I need to focus on. That is not to say that I don’t wanna think about them; it’s just not my top priority. Unfortunately, this has proven to be a problem, cause it keeps popping into my head. And it’s not that I’m looking for someone in particular. I’m trying to make myself realize that I don’t need someone in order to validate how special I am. That’s not to say that it wouldn’t be nice to have a significant other. But it’s important to like myself before allowing someone else to like me as much as I should like myself (if that makes any sense). Plus, I’m trying to take it easy since the end of the semester with Kayte and I, who by the way, just returned from England. It seems like she had a good time. [Side Note: I wrote on her wall: I found a clip from Carmen Sandiego that had to do with Maine, and in one part, Cape Elizabeth, where she is from. I truly thought she would like it. I found it cool and informative, anyway. Haha]

I should be taking this summer and having a blast with my friends, and not preoccupied about things like why I would not make a good bf or why it would never work between me and so-and-so so why even go for it. I should be enjoying the break and the warm (sometimes scalding) weather.

So, whenever I get in this mood, I listen to some great music on my iPod. Or I talk it out to my good buddies. Or a combination of both. Tonight, it’s the music option. And It’s R&B and Jazz, a few of my favorite music genres.

The next post on this blog won’t actually be written by me. It’ll be written by someone else. But I read this piece of work often, and I think it’s well-written. Plus, I like it.

I’m about to go to bed for the night. I’ll be out of my funk soon enough. I just miss a lot of people that I used to talk to on nearly a daily basis. But on a good note, the weekend is nearly here. Sweetness…

Quick Bites

It's been a bit of time since I've posted. And some stuff has happened:

I've started an internship at the State House with the Governor, Deval Patrick. My friend, Jimy works in the Press Office, and that's where I intern. I'll be doing this all summer. I just met the Governor today, and I have to say, he's a very nice and quite funny guy. Well-spoken as well. The other interns that I work with are pretty cool as well. This should be fun.

Joe, one of the managers at TOMB, had his Jeopardy! episode today. So a bunch of us had a potluck and watched it, and then played a few games of Jeopardy! afterwards. I still need to work on my annunciation skills.

Rohan, Jon, Divya, Caitlin, Angie, and Nicole went with me to late night bowling at Boston Bowl. I had free bowling coupons, so we went and played some rounds. It's been a while since I've played, cause both times I failed to break 100. But that's ok; we all had a fantastic time.

I've been talking to the FETCH! folk for a bit, just makin' sure that they don't forget that I exist.

I'm also trying very hard to keep in mind that I'm cool the way that I am. I've been having a bit of a lapse in the confidence department. Thankfully, I've got some people to keep me in check.

Not much else is going on. Nothing anyway that I would write here. So if you wanna know more, tough. Just Kidding. Sorta.

I've got work in the morning. Peace.

Thought Doodles

I'm not too sure what I want to write about, so I'm just gonna write what comes to my mind and we'll see what happens.

Kayte leaves for England in about 2 days, and she seems very excited to go. We haven't talked too much to each other lately. I'm beginning to think that she wants nothing to do with me anymore and is just being polite by talking to me for 3 to 5 minutes at a time. I'm not saying that this is true, but it is the vibe that I am getting. To be honest with you (whoever "you" may be), I had a feeling that this was going to happen when we decided to break it off for the summer. There was a period where things we ok, and then things kinda went downhill for a bit; there was miscommunication problems and hurt feelings. And now I rarely hear from her. But she's working, and is excited to see her friend Darren in England. So I'm happy for that. At the end of the summer, we're supposed to talk about whether we should get back together or not. I've been doing a lot of thinking about that since the summer began; I don't know the answer, and I doubt I'll know until the end of the summer comes. She's a great person, and sometimes I wonder if she knows that about herself. Have fun in England, Kayte. You deserve it.

Rohan is going to a wedding for a family member this weekend in Pennsylvania, so he won't be here this weekend. I'm sure he'll have some fun over there. So I'll be spending my weekend with Sim & Ali at Sim's pool house; he's throwing a party. This should be interesting...

I had a nice conversation with one of Divya's friends, Caitlin (a new friend of mine), about her relationship with her boyfriend of 2 years. She goes to UMass, but right now her boyfriend goes to school in New Jersey (I believe). They met two years ago; they used to go to neighboring schools, but have since transferred. The story of how they met was interesting; I'm not gonna tell it here, but sufficed to say, I really enjoyed it. Why am I writing about it? Not sure really, it was just on my mind.

It's official: I am planning a trip to Washington D.C. And I don't think I'm going alone. Rohan has expressed interest in going, so I'm now in the process of looking at schedules and tickets. Right now it looks like a July visit. So get ready, D.C., cause your world is about to be ROCKED!

I'm on the search to find confidence. It's proven to be a more difficult task then I thought. But last week I had a great conversation with Tali online, and one of the things that came up was confidence. I lack it at times (more often than not), but she made a good point about it:

"Realize that you are awesome and worth knowing."

Up to that point, I had never thought of myself in that way. Honest. But it's something that I've been working on. I mean, I have a fairly good life, with a good family, and great friends. My game show dream is slowly coming true, what with all of these great people and jobs. And I think that it has something to do with showing them that I have some confidence in myself. And I know that i can be successful, so I shouldn't worry about it.

All day Sunday, I watched Robot Chicken online. It's a funny show, and I enjoy it a lot, but I wanted to do more with my Sunday. I went to Rohan's house and we watched TV for another few hours. He's got cable, so it was marginally better than hanging out at home alone watching TV.

Last Sunday i was supposed to hang out with my good friend, Laura. I know her from when I lived in Somerville. But for whatever reason, that did not happen. I tried contacting her in a variety of mediums, but all of them were unanswered. I was really upset that she didn't call me; I was worried that something may have happened. I didn't hear from her until the following Friday when I got a FB message. It was nice to hear from her, but I have not responded yet; I want to make sure I know how want to say to her before I write it. It just stinks to have that happen to someone. I certainly don't like it, and I wouldn't want it to happen to one of my friends either.

I've got Wheelock at 11AM, so I'm gonna watch some Venture Bros. and then attempt to go to bed.

Peace Out!

Peace, Love, And Labor

I've been watching a lot of Password Plus, which is currently featured in the "Screening Room," located to the left of the page. It's my favorite Password incarnation, and one of my favorite game shows. It's one of the few things this week that is consistently making me happy. That and hanging out with my great friends.

Bob Barker has officially retired from television, taping his last episode of The Price Is Right earlier this week. It is a great lost, but he deserves the retirement. Whoever takes his place has got some BIG shoes to fill.

There's actually a lot of game show news flying around. A few new shows will be premiering in the next few months: Set For Life, Power Of 10, Crosswords just to name a few. How many of these shows will stay on the air? I actually don't know, but I'm gonna try to catch as many of them as possible.

In my last post, I was gonna digress about my weekend. Sadly, I have to go back on my word; it's not very important. But I can summarize the weekend:

*I hung out with Rohan, Jon, Sim, Ali, Divya, and Tali more or less all weekend.
*I was introduced to Venture Bros.
*I earned $20 by drinking a cup of beer (which, by the way, Jon still owes me $10 of)
*FIFA for PS2 is a difficult game to master.
*I probably have the best group of friends ever; they are there to support me whenever I need it.

That's all you really need to know anyway.

Friday (the 8th), it's going to be a night of food, drink, and happiness. The food will come from Longhorn Steakhouse. The drink is unknown at the current moment, but the happiness will come from the crazy stuff we'll (The Crew) will be doing. I'm excited.

But first... I have to survive the work day. It starts between 10AM and 11AM and will go from 4PM to 5PM. It will require me to sit at the desk and file and sort papers all day. I've got to pay the bills somehow. Wheelock is an ok place to work, but lately I've been less and less excited to go. I mean, it's a job, yes. But I was told I would be doing different kinds of work, and instead I'm still doing the same things I was doing before I got the "promotion." A little annoying, but I have a meeting with my boss at 2PM about that, so hopefully things will change.

I was scrounging around my computer and I found a couple of short stories that I wrote a few years ago. Both of them are about relationships during high school or college; both of them are not super. I'm surprised that I kept these; I thought I got rid of them a long time ago. After reading them both, I realized that I should write more in general; quality aside, I really had fun writing them.

I leave you with one of my favorite music videos by one of my favorite artists. Say what you will about it, but I enjoy it.



Much Love To All.

Next Up...

It was a faily fun and exciting weekend, and yet, at the end of it, I fell into a slight state of depression.

I'll Write More About The Entire Weekend Later.