I like to think that I'm ok with finances. I like to make sure that the important things in my life get taken care of. So when I set up a plan for myself, and then find out that I messed up somewhere along the way, I instantly become the last person you want to hang out with.
Such is the case as of 10 minutes ago. For the past few weeks, I had the impression that as long as I made it to Thursday, all my obligations would be taken care of because I will have gotten paid. Normally as I get closer to the end of the month, I spend less and less, sometimes not eating just to make sure that my ends meet.
Stupid me forgot to notice that unlike the other 11, the month of February only has 28 days (29 on a leap year), and the 28th falls on a Monday. This means that there is a 3 day gap between when I need to have all of my money and when I will have all of my money.
I don't like to be late on things, and recently I've had to pick and choose what things I would be able to pay on time. I've been behind on a few payments, and I thought that this week I would finally catch up and I would be in the clear. Instead, I'm going to be even further behind and be in a stressed out mode for a while.
I went to buy groceries yesterday and now I completely regret it. I would have rather starved myself for a week than to be even further behind. Now I have one day to get everything ready and I don't know what I'm going to do.
Borrowing money is something that I don't like to do because it makes me feel like a charity case. I also have trust issues, even with my friends, so I don't always believe they'll be there for me. These are some of the toughest times for me and my well-being deteriorates rapidly.
We'll just have to see what happens. I hate money.
Peace Out.
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