Summer Reflections: Part 1

It's taken me a little bit of time, but I think I'm finally ready to write.

This past summer has probably been the one in which I have grown and changed the most. There have been a lot of events and occurances that have happened either to me or to those who I am or were close to, and each one has helped shaped who I have become right now. And I think I'm ready to share my findings.

Being 21 years old has opened so many new doors this summer. It's been kinda liberating actually. And it's nice that my closest friends are also 21; it gives me a chance to hang out with them in a new and social setting. I've also been privileged with meeting some new people and becoming great friends with them. A year ago, I would safely say that I would have not been as outgoing as I was this summer. And I think it really helped.

This summer I think I realized who my true friends are. It doesn't surprise me that it mainly consisted of people I didn't hang out with during the school year. This is by no means a slight to those I did chill with during the school year, but it was made very apparent to me who I could really trust unconditionally. That list is very small. In fact, a few people were removed from it for one reason or another. It dawned on me that friendship is something I truly cherish. I can say that I really love my friends. They have been there for me during every worrying session or venting or solemn moment. I know they have my back. And I have theirs. It's sad that a good number of them have left to go back to school. But they will be back. Plus I still have the buddies that go to school here...

It's been a little over 3 months since I've been in a relationship. It's been kinda hard, especially with the way things ended. My friends know how hard it's been, but it has been easier everyday. They have done so much for me to cheer me up, and for that I thank you. They also chimed in with their thoughts, feelings, and advice (which I have talked about in previous posts). During this time, I made some important discoveries and decisions. It was a bit foolish for me to think that a "break" would not turn into a "break up" before the summer was over. I really liked and cared for the person I was with, and I wished that A: she knew I felt that way during the relationship and B: I had shown that a little more. To me, the "break" meant for me to be alone without her and her without me and see how it went for a few months. Feelings were hurt on both ends, and it's what I think helped propel the events that occurred. But I am so glad that I had that time to think and reflect on the relationship. It has helped me learn more about myself and more about what I am looking for. She's got someone new, and that's fine. It initially hurt a lot (more than I, and she, thought it would). Some people thought that she did it on purpose just to hurt me. But the point is that things happen for a reason, and if we were not meant to be together, then so be it. Deal with it, suck it up, learn from it, and move on. I know that I am capable of loving someone; I just take a but longer than most others (and that's attributed to a few reasons, which I won't go into). I think it will be harder for me to find someone because of this trait, but I have to trust that I will be blessed with someone who understands that and will love me for me. The past relationships I've had have shown me more about who I am & what I want when it comes to relationships. My time will come, and when it does, it will be worth the wait and work.

This summer has also revealed that I am more outgoing than I thought I was. I'm a bit less worried about rejection. Well, maybe not that, but at least I know that I can make 1st moves. Or any moves in general. Plus, some people out there think I'm moderately attractive. So HA!

I want to be in the game show business so badly. It became very clear to me this summer. I TiVo'ed game show episodes all summer. I watched and analyzed them. I've come up with at least 5 new ideas this summer. I'm itching to get this off the ground. And I think I would be great at it. So many people have helped me so far, and many will help in the future. Trust me when I say that I won't forget what you guys have done for me.

There's still more to this, but it's getting kind of late, so I'm gonna go to bed.


Much Love To Those I Love Most.

1 Request

I really wish I had someone to hug me... it's been a tough and confusing week, and that's all I want.

That Does It

Every time I have the urge to post something huge, it turns out that the actual post is a bit on the small side. Kinda like this one's gonna be. But I have been very busy lately, and there's so much stuff that I would love to write about.

So... I think that before I start school, no matter what, I will post something significant. I kinda have to now, since I've been hyping it up for so freakin' long.

Well, back to Casablanca. God, I love that movie.

Ahoy There!

I'm on a ship on my way to Martha's Vineyard for the weekend with Rohan, Jon, Sim, & Ali. They are currently playing hide & seek, and I'll join them a little later. We'll be there until Monday.

There are just a few wees left in summer before school starts. Ugh.

My pitches are almost done; just a little more work to do on them. There have been so many people who have helped me with this, and I thank you all. I really do.

God Bless Merv Griffin.

Alright, I'm out. You'll hear from me soon.

From Bad To, Well...

What started as a bad day turned out to be slightly good. That's it really. I'm just a bit tired and run down right now. Just a few weeks till the new semester, and my friends leave to go back to school.

What I wouldn't give for a nice night out on the town...

Oh, and podcast is just days away.

Peace

New Vocabulary

Beaver Dam (n): the female equivalent of the male "cock block."
I heard this for the first time tonight at a small get together with my friend Sam and a group of his friends. I found it hilarious and logical at the same time.

I recently watched what is, in my opinion, one of the new best game shows produced in a while. Hosted by Drew Carey, CBS' Power Of 10 is a clever game where contestants try to predict the results of a nationwide poll. They can win up to $10 Million. I don't want to ruin anything from the episodes, cause you can watch them online at CBS.com, so all I will say is that you should check it out.

Speaking of game shows, I am less than two weeks from producing the radio game show podcast. I'm just looking for panelist.

Also, I'm about 2 weeks from having my pitch for PBS ready to show. I've got two fairly good game shows targeted towards kids. I am actually very excited about these.

My trip to P-Town was very relaxing. It was great to hang out with Natasha. We'll be keeping in touch.

Only a few loose ends are left to tie this summer, but I'm happy to say that most of the questions I had this summer have been answered. For better or for worse.

I still want to go clubbing with Courtney. So if you are reading this, Court, don't think I forgot...

What I would love this week is to have someone to hold. That or a piece of cake.

Will I See You In September, Or Lose You To A Summer Love...?

Not only is my phone acting up, but my internet is doing the same thing and it's beginning to interfere with my work. Not to mention talking to my friends.

I won't be spending as much time in the Fenway area this semester as I did last semester.

I apologize for these short and erratic postings. How about I write a long one next time to make it up to you.

OK, it's time for bed. I've got a 4 hour shift tomorrow. I need the money.


(PS: I Like You A Lot, More Than I Thought I Did...)

I'm A Travelling Man

I'm on the road to a very fun-filled weekend. This Friday I leave for P-Town. I'm going to stay with Natasha for the weekend. It's been an epic battle of planning and schedules. Originally, I was going to go down to Washington D.C. to go visit her. But I never had the chance to leave Boston long enough to make the journey.

Then it turns out that she's in P-Town this weekend. I live much closer to P-Town than D.C., so I will buy a ticket for a ferry ride immediately after being at the State House, which means that I need to dress down a little that day.

It's a camping outing. I haven't gone camping in years. This will be interesting...


There's more stuff later tonight.